Goodwin Says HI Tunstall Says YO
by Catching Fireflies
Summary: Pretty much what the title says. It starts with Goodwin and Tunstall and spirals out from there. cursed to curse wrote the first two chapters, but the rest is me. This is just a joke from when I was learning how to submit a fanfic, so please don't take it seriously.
1. Chapter 1

**This is just a practice fanfic. It's not meant to be good in any way. My amazing sister, Anarchy Girl wrote this. This is exactly what the title says. In case you were wondering, there will be more chapters.**

Goodwin says, "Hi." Because, you know. In the Lower City, we're all family.

Tunstall smirks, as if HE can SO do better than that. Which he can't, because Goodwin is so much awesomer.

Tunstall says, "YO!" Just like a freaking rapper! Generation skip times a thousand!

Goodwin starts to cry and runs away from Tunstall, who is chasing after her saying, "YO! YO! YO!"

Look out your window. He's still running.


	2. Mistress Head and a Couple of Drunk Dogs

**This is another practice one! This is also written by Anarchy Girl. Ha, now the Beka Cooper series will have more than 241 fanfics!**

**Beware, my good friends... MISTRESS NOLL IS COMING!**

Mattes Tunstall, Beka Cooper, and everyone's favorite Clary Goodwin were on watch.

If you're a Rat, you shouldn't be reading this. Just run and hide already.

Plus, people, there's this Shadow Snake thing on the loose. What's up with that, anyway? Who could that be... hmm... *coughMistressNollcough* So yeah. Run now, everyone.

BACK TO THE DOGS! (As in, gods, the Lower City has sure gone to the Dogs.) So, the mighty trio of Goodwin the Invincible, Tunstall the Not-So Invincible, and Cooper the Puny Little Puppy are walking to the Nightmarket.

And a very strange thing happened.

*time skip to Court Day. Tunstall is reporting*

"What's up, Sir I-can't-remember-your-name-because-there're-too-ma ny-characters-in-this-story. So, we Ratted a bag," he says, grinning broadly at Sir fill-in-the-blank.

"Sorry, Sir Night. We had too much Pullet at the Mantle and Ale," says Goodwin, unaware that she, too, is VERY VERY DRUUUNK. "Go on Tunstalling, Report."

"Lordmy, we were rounding the walk when we violence sounds of heard," says Tunstall. "We Nightmarketed to the Walk. And then we heard a voice. Was it Yates."

"Yes, it was, Tunstall," says Beka Cooper, the only sober one of the bunch. "Go on."

"So, it was Yates," says Goodwin, because Tunstall has promptly passed out. "He Gemmaed Hit. And, y'know, SUUUR WHAT'SYOURFACE, as Gods, we can't allow that. So we went up to him and we Talked a Had." Goodwin, scarily unaware of all the funny looks she's getting, continues. "And he says to us, says he, IF YOU HARM A HAIR ON MISTRESS HEAD'S NOLL, then I'm gonna you kill."

"And that's really funny because..." says Sir Tullus, raising an eyebrow. Everyone is laughing at Goodwin and Tunstall.

"Because Noll, that's her name last, means head. So, with our Lower City slang, he said, "If you harm a hair on MISTRESS HEAD'S HEAD! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Goodwin passes out too.

**Yo. Hi. Goodbye.**


	3. Hey!

**Hi, guys! Or should I say, YO!? I was planning on not updating again, but I think I will. This time... this is actually Catching Fireflies writing (takes a bow)! Just to let you know, this is just a parody, so it's definitely not my best writing at all. If you like the Hunger Games trilogy, I'd recommend some of my other fanfics. And thanks to Anarchy Girl and ailes du neige for reviewing! I'm dedicating this chapter to Anarchy Girl, since she reviewed, wrote the first two chapters, and of course likes rap music. In this chapter, the drunk Dogs sober up and discover a new word of greeting... "Hey!"**

_**Hey!**_

Goodwin and Tunstall are collapsed in a heap under a table in the Mantel and Pullet. They're sober now, with epic hangovers. "Ugh," moans Tunstall. "I have such a headache."

"Same with me," groans Goodwin, crawling out from under the table and getting to her feet. "Oh, NO! My uniform is stained with ale." They both bemoan this sad fact for a few minutes as Goodwin tries to wash it out. Then Goodwin notices something else. "Oh! Kora is a mage! She'll be able to heal us!"

They do a stupid happy dance around the completely empty Mantel and Pullet, but then the door creaks open. There, in the threshold, stands everyone's favorite Beka Cooper! And of course, Goodwin and Tunstall are tripping over their own feet to greet her to this wonderfully disgusting junk heap of a bar.

"Hi!" squeals Goodwin, giving the very unfortunate Beka a big hug. "Hi, hi, hi!"

"YO!" bellows Tunstall. What a barbarian. And now he's... _rapping_? "Yo, yo, yo, yo!"

Beka is puzzled, not sure what to make of her shrieking, rapping friends. Finally, she decides that she, being magical and all that, can top them _easily._ "Hey!" she says with a big grin, smirking at Tunstall and Goodwin. (Who are now dancing to an odd medley of rap songs, in case you were interested.)

Goodwin and Tunstall stop for a second. "I CALL IT! I CALL IT!" screams Goodwin, trying to claim possession of the word _hey._

"NO!" yells Beka. "_I_ SAID IT FIRST!"

For a second, Tunstall says nothing, just contemplating the scene before his eyes. And then he bursts into song. Well, not song; rap.

"I _can't_ tell you what it really is, I can only tell you what it feels like, and right now..." he raps as Beka puts a knife to his throat, "there's a STEEL KNIFE in my windpipe!"

**Author's Note again:**

**I do not own the song Love The Way You Lie by Eminem feat. Rihanna, although it is an awesome song. Tunstall's YO-ing is not part of that song, by the way. Tunstall's last dialogue, however, is. In case you didn't know. That's another reason this chapter is dedicated to my sister Anarchy Girl: she's obsessed with Eminem. See ya! Or should I say, "Hey!"**


End file.
